Free to be..

“There is a part of us which wants to break free of the shackles that bind us. What is that stops us? That makes us step back . Pause. Postpone….forget…regret.  We can be all that that we want to be.”
      These words which Jeremy’s English teacher had said last week were still ringing clearly in his head. “I can be aaall that I want to be..” he wondered with his face radiating hope.
      Jeremy had just turned 13 this winter. He looked outside into the foggy street. There is so much that he had seen on these very streets. People rushing to work, children waiting for their school buses and the vendors from ice cream to popcorn to veggies to mangoes….”
“What do I want to be?”he wondered. Jeremy didn’t have to go to school, the school came home.”I am so lucky” he thought.”I can get up an hour later than all my buddies” he thought.
     But he would have loved to go play in the evenings. Teachers would come teach and go. He would thoroughly enjoy his bowl of yogurt after his lunch. Take his nap. And the sounds of the football game would be his alarm. A tear would trickle down his face. He made sure the tear would be just his. His alone.
       He wasn’t sad cause he couldn’t walk .His wheelchair was faster transportation he had reasoned. All that ached him was that he couldn’t play the game he loved so much.
   Fall on the grass. Shoot the ball . Hit a goal. Relish it…. Play for a team. Run across the field .Imitate Henry and maybe even“hush” a hostile crowd .
  Just as he would start getting deep into the thought, the encourager in him would  emerge and somehow bring him through before the feeling could engulf him.
    Today even as he looked at his skinny legs which maybe lacked the strength to carry him, he knew there was strength within which was enough. He believed, there is nothing that could stop him from being all that He was meant to be.
   So each day Jeremy would take his dark green notepad and let all that would be stored up in his tiny heart to be etched by the blue fountain pen he loved so dearly.
    Today as he took his dream book, it began to drizzle. He stretched his right hand out of the window to feel the first drops of the heavenly shower. He slowly moved towards the door. Unlatched it. Slowly opened it and carefully maneuvered his wheelchair. He was out. He took the slope beside the stairs and silently thanked uncle Tim who had sponsored it.
    The ground was across the street. He looked to the left. The rain Gods had  now become more generous. He turned to the right. With one hand as a shield to his eyes and other at the wheels, he pushed forward. He felt as though someone called him from his window. He didn’t hear that he told himself. He had reached the other side but a pavement was between him and the slugfest going on in the ground. ”I guess I should just go back”  said Jeremy.
   He tried to turn his wheelchair, …but he couldn’t. Someone was holding it. He looked up, and saw a familiar pair of spectacles …”Unca’ Timmy!!” he shrieked as he almost jumped off his chair. He helped Jeremy onto the pavement. Then even as Uncle Tim was pushing the chair, Jeremy let his own hands do the work. He raced ahead onto to the inclined  strip which led him onto the grass.
                           He paused. Looked skywards. Saw the huge droplets come down. Shut his eyelids tight. His outstretched arms let his whole being be one with it all .
 Slowly opened his eyes. Looked at the kids playin’ fifty meters up front. He began to debate about what all his feet were capable of. Just when he was about to begin the duel. The ball came rolling and stopped two feet to his right.
One thing he knew for sure , no point juggling around in theory when a practical  evaluation was possible. So without a second thought moved ahead. Still raining .The buzz around him similar to that of a t.v with no channels to show. He held the arms of the chair tight. Took his right feet back ,to the right at an angle outside the realms of his chair which had bound him,…then brought it back to the base of the ball..”Thump!” . It didn’t reach them. But he could kick. Yes he could!!
       Then he pressed ahead. Suddenly looked behind to see his uncle standing.
Uncle Tim placed both his hands on either side of his mouth, and was about to say something. Jeremy could envision the words come out “Enough, lets go Jeremy !”.
 And three words echoed loud and clear…. “ Go Jeremy Go!!”
        The next one hour flew by. He scored two of the six goals his team scored. For once his white t-shirt didn’t get dirty because of the jam he dropped on it. Some of Jeremy’s dreams came to pass that rainy evening. He hushed the rain.. was carried round the park …Laughed…Screamed …Danced….Lived.
                                    That day when he laid down, he knew that many times in life,..he may not have an uncle to help him cross over the pavement. But one thing was sure…., he had found a strength that day...a strength which will make him think twice before turning back.

                                       And as he slowly let his eyes shut, murmured silently “I can be aaall that I want to be”.

Sammy’s little walk

The dusty road lay in front of little Sammy when he left his home another lazy Saturday morning. It had been one week since his holidays had started. His holiday homework still didn’t worry him too much. The last week should be good enough for that, he thought.
              His mom had asked him to get some milk, he didn’t mind doing any chore where he got the opportunity to go to the shop around the corner. As sweets would be his unspoken reward. As Sammy saw the sun beating down as though with vengeance, he thought “I should do something exciting today”.
Something just clicked. A river of excitement overtook him. There was a glint in his eyes. He wanted to quickly be done with the task at hand and go in pursuit of this new mission he had for the day.
He began to run. He rushed to the store. Panting, he asked uncle Joe ”give me two packets of milk”. Uncle Joe replied “What about your sweet marbles”. Sammy realized he almost forgot about them, rarely does that happen he thought. Paid the cash, quickly gobbled up the marbles, put the milk packets into the bag, and began to hurry back. He saw his buddy Jack around the bend in his cycle..Sammy shrieked..”Jackieee!”.Jack stopped his bike with a sudden jolt.
Sammy ran , sat on the carrier at the back ,”drop me to my place, fast!”, he commanded. Rarely had Jack seen him in a hurry like this, so curious he asked “What’s the rush about?”.Sammy seemed to be in a world of his own and responded with ”Will tell ya, but later.”
   Noticing the purpose in sammy’s voice he dared not to poke further into the matter.
Then as his home neared, he jumped before Jack had applied the brakes, he almost fell. Sammy could hear Jack chuckle, but he didn’t care, greater things were there in his tiny heart; he shouted “Thanks pal” as he rushed up the stairs.
Nobody seemed to be home, he placed the milk packets into the fridge, ‘it’s done’ he thought. “The adventure begins” he said with great resolve.
There was a river that flowed through the woods which would usually take one and a half hour to reach if he went past his backyard. “Sammy don’t go there. Ok?” Grandma used to say. The thrill, the fear, the anxiety it sure churned up a funny feeling in his belly.
   As he was planning his thrill trip he thought, ”It’s better if I feed my tummy before I leave, lest it became a reason to turn back.”
So he grabbed a quick bite before he left. Different thoughts passed through his mind as he was making his way through the backyard. Jumping over the fence. Into the wild.
  Loved the sound that the dried maple leaves under his feet made. It reminded him of the time he munched on his favorite tomato flavored pack of wafers.”Don’t have too much of that, or else you’ll have a heart attack.”Mommy warned each time. It had been a while since he had began .”I will be home before it gets dark”, he said, as if making a solemn pact with himself.
  Suddenly he could hear a strange hissing sound. He freezed in his step. His eyes resembled a fast paced ping-pong match.
Took a long deep breath and….Slowly smiling realized it’s the sound of the river gushing.
The fear transformed into glee. Sammy started to jog, dodging the huge mammoth sized trees that came in his way.
He could see the water every now and then now.”Wow this is sooo much fun!” he exclaimed. Finally he was at the bank of the biggest mass of flowing water he had ever seen. This seemed so different . The cold wind ,…the strange sounds ,..the mighty river…..the orange sky..
     He sat down, to soak it all in. He at that moment wanted a bag which could capture this feeling, all that was around him. To be re-lived when he wished. Then across the river he saw a huge dark figure hidden between the trees. Sammy felt a chill up his spine starring at it and then at the water body that separated them, suddenly felt secure as though the river was his defender. The figure seemed to be still there, as though watching Sammy.                          
      Then he saw the sun had began moving to it’s abode, he thought he must also. ”Hmm…but I wanna see what ..or who is this, then will my adventure be complete” ,he argued as though his daddy were here.
   Suddenly it moved, began to come into the light. It was a Bear!!And there were two more little ones who came out. They sipped on the water.”Boy this is one summer adventure, Jack would find difficult to beat” he thought smiling. With this thought he turned around into the woods, which looked way different than when he came. “There are at least two hours for it to be dark ,and the journey should not take more than an hour and forty five minutes ,now that I’m a little tired“ he assured himself. He began to sing. As he reached the part where he could remember no more, he shifted to the next one.
         He could feel someone asking him ”What if you get lost?”. He kept singing and following the path he believed he had come by. It had been a while walking. He felt horribly thirsty. He had been feeling thirsty from quite a while he realized but the events had kept his mind from giving it attention.
“Just a little more”, he encouraged. Began a new song thinking about what would be the dessert tonight. Many games he had played ,now he was learning a new one ,with his mind.
He suddenly felt as if he had grown before his eyes in this little journey. He saw a familiar green window. He felt a peace within, knew the games could end.
Took a leaf from the ground as a souvenir before he jumped over the fence. Entered his home, went to the kitchen, his mom was cooking, gave her a hug around her waist.”Have you washed your hands and feet?” asked mommy.”I will mommy” Sammy replied.
“How was your day Sammy?”

 A million thoughts passed by, trees, river, joy , bear , fear, and the songs which brought him back.

 He paused and finally said “It was nice mommy. It was nice….” 

Mommy cares

he may run , slip , fall or rise...

be blinded by the glare,

mommy cares still..

life took him on a ride so fast,

the past a blur ,

wish'in to buy some more time

mommy cares still..